Curse Le Cid!!
by Moi -D
Summary: Moi ô¿ô tries out for the Gold Saucer Orchestra, and things pretty much get bad for him, Cloud, Yuffie, and the gang after that...AHHHHH! More self insertion!!!!


Moi ô¿ô:.................................................................................................................................  
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................  
Yuffie: What kind of an introduction was that!?  
Moi ô¿ô: I'm sick of writing intorductions.  
Yuffie: Cheapskate!  
Moi ô¿ô: Don't make me call the poop-bent chocobos.  
Yuffie: You wouldn't!!  
Moi ô¿ô: *whistles*  
The chocobos run at Yuffie.  
Yuffie: AHHHH!!! *runs and pulls the red fic-start lever*  
  
Disclaimer: To own or not to own; that is the question! Weather tis nobler in the mind just to say "I own nothing mentioned in this fic" or to suffer the slings and arrows of the evil baka lawyers. Thats easy. I own nothing mentioned in this fic.  
  
Curse Le Cid!  
By Moi ô¿ô  
  
At the Gold Saucer, Moi ô¿ô is talking to the music director.  
Director: And here are your audition song exerpts.  
Moi ô¿ô: Thanks alot! I can't wait to audition for this music program.  
Director: Remember, its important that you come to your audition.  
Moi ô¿ô: I'll be there, don't you worry!  
Back at Cloud's Condo.  
Moi ô¿ô: *takes his violin out, and starts practicing his song exerpts* Man.....these are brutal......  
Cid comes inside, yelling at Yuffie.  
Yuffie: I can't be resposible for what Cloud did!!!  
Cid: But you stole that materia from me and gave it to him!!!!!   
Yuffie: I didn't know that he'd mistake it for a gumball!!!!  
Cid: But he's such a ^%!#@'n moron!! *takes Yuffie's master magic materia, and hurls it into the sea*  
Yuffie: NOOOOO!!! *runs after it, and gets attacked by a shark*  
Cid: *slams the condo door*  
Moi ô¿ô: *shakes his head, and practices the last song on his list*  
Cid: *listens for a few seconds before protesting* Don't you know anything besides *^&$'n classical music?  
Moi ô¿ô: What music do you like?  
Cid: What's that stupid song called anyways?  
Moi ô¿ô: Uhhh....*looks at the title*.........Le Cid. (It IS a real song!!! I have to play an exerpt from it for my youth symphony audition!!)  
Cid: What!?  
Moi ô¿ô: *blinks* Yeah...Le Cid.  
Cid: They wrote a song about me!! *has a starry look in his eyes* Play it again!  
Moi ô¿ô: Nah....my fingers hurt....I'm gonna take a break.  
Cid: *takes his spear out and corners Moi ô¿ô* Play it again!!!  
Moi ô¿ô: O_O OK OK!!  
56 rounds of the 12 measure tune later.........  
Cloud: Is it over?  
Cid: Again!!  
Moi ô¿ô: ...................  
Cid: AGAIN!!!  
Aeris: His fingers are too tired! He can't even type the story! Are you happy now Cid!?!?!  
Aeris heals Moi ô¿ô's fingers.  
Moi ô¿ô: Thanks Aeris.  
Cid: *grabs Moi ô¿ô's voilin, and tries to immitate the song, but breaks every string in the process*  
Moi ô¿ô: STOP!!!  
Cid: Ahh! Piece of junk! *throws it out the winow, and hits Tifa in the head*  
Tifa is KOed, and the violin is in pieces.  
Moi ô¿ô: WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY VIOLIN!!?!?!?!? *looks like he's ready to murder Cid*  
Cid: *looks at Moi ô¿ô* What!?  
Tifa: *gets up* Uggghhh! *runs into walls* Aggh! *picks up a wad of grass, and stuffs it down her shirt*  
Cloud: What did you do to Tifa?!??!  
Tifa: *walks into the condo and drags Cloud around* Bah!  
Cloud: Help meeeee!  
Tifa: *waltzes with Cloud to non-existant music*  
Cloud: Waaaa!!  
Moi ô¿ô: O_o  
Tifa: *sings the song that Yuffie sang about her* (See Cloud and Tifa's "Wedding") Cuz I'm a hooker...yeah yeah fake boobs....big head.....tiny brains.....a walking oxymoron, yeah! *finishes the song and does a pose* And for my encore.............. *shoves Cloud in a box that magically appears, and takes out a saw*  
Cloud: Pity me......  
Cid: Don't worry, we do.  
Moi ô¿ô: *stops staring at Cloud and Tifa, and returns his attention to Cid*   
Cid: *sees the way Moi ô¿ô looks at him* Uh-oh.......  
Outside, Sephiroth walks up the stepps in bandages, from his recent bout with some man-eating pocky........  
Seph: Just a few more stepps......*makes it to the door*  
Cid and Moi ô¿ô burst through the door, sending Seph flying into Yuffie, who has the shark in a head lock.  
Moi ô¿ô: DIE HIGHWIND!!!!  
Cid: *runs like mad* AHHH!!!!! *tripps over Nanaki*  
Nanaki: Watch where you're going!!  
Moi ô¿ô: *tackles Cid* KISAMA!! Now you DIE at my hands!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!! *realizes that everyone in town is looking at them*  
Nanaki: *walks away* I need a drink.....  
::Silence::  
::Silence::  
::Silence::  
Hojo walks out of the mental hospital, still doing hand motions around his head*  
Hojo: I-am-your-wash-ing-ma-chine!  
Moi ô¿ô: o.o  
Cid: *&$!! He's still doing that?!?!?  
Moi ô¿ô: Now where was I? Oh yeah! HAHAHAHAHAAAA!!! *sits on Cid's back, and hits him over the head with the broken pieces of the violin*  
On the beach..........  
Yuffie: DIE SHARK!! *kills it with a flare attack* Yahoo!  
Seph: *wakes up on the sand, and gets sprayed with shark guts* AHHH!! *sits up bolt upright* I had the weirdest dream, Mom! You were a space creature, and I summoned a meteor, but then some spiky haired dude killed me, and I came back and got pooped on by chocobos, but I'm ok now! ^_^  
Yuffie: *walks toward Seph, covered in seaweed, and spots of shark blood, holding her materia* I am the queen!!! Haaahaahaahaa!  
Seph: *gasps* Look, Mom! Its The queen!  
Yuffie: *gets into a fighting stance* Jenova's here!?!??  
Seph: *blinks and looks around* Mom? MOM?? Well thats odd.....I should be in my bed.  
Yuffie: Uh-oh....a flashback.... *kicks Seph in the head, and he recovers*  
Seph: Uggghh......*bleeds*  
Yuffie: AHHHHH!! BLOOD!!! *runs into the condo, to her room, and locks the door*  
Back in the town square, 12 days later...........  
Moi ô¿ô: Ok....I think you've suffered enough. *loks at his watch, and gasps* My audition!!! I'm LATE!!! *takes the broken violin,a nd leaves for the Gold Saucer*  
At the Gold Saucer.  
Moi ô¿ô: I'M HERE!!!  
Music Director: Oh, I'm sorry, but we've already seleced our first chair violinist!  
Moi ô¿ô: *anime eye twitch* You have?  
Music Director: Yes! *walks a boy out of the practice room  
that looks exactally like Moi ô¿ô*  
Moi ô¿ô: *stares*   
  
THE END ô¿ô!  
  
Yuffie: That was it?!?!  
Moi ô¿ô: So?  
Yuffie: I'm left in suspence!!  
Moi ô¿ô: Heheheheheh.  
Yuffie: You enjoy this don't you?  
Moi ô¿ô: To a significant degree.  
Yuffie: GRRR!!! I will kill yo-  
Moi ô¿ô: *has frozen Yuffie with his author powers* Buh-Bye Folks!  
  
The REAL End ô¿ô!  



End file.
